Ballerinas have lovely backs, don't you think? They're especially apparent when wearing a strappy leotard. Today, as I was standing at the barre (one swan in front of me, and one behind me), I noticed a little something that set me apart from all the other ladies. Curious, I snuck a look at all of the dancers in my class including my warrior teacher.
Yup.
I was the only girl in the class wearing a bra. For a split second, I was a little embarrassed and inwardly scowled at my Italian heritage. ("Why couldn't I be blessed with an "Almost A" cup like everyone else?) Then, as I did some further investigating, I saw that there were a few swans who maybe should have been wearing one. I concluded that I would much rather be supported than not. Then one girl came into the studio late wearing a hot pink sports bra, so I had a friend.
The end. Moving on.
Today's class was a little harder than I would have liked. Remember in Dance Log 1 when I said each day I felt like I was slowly getting better? Yeah. Can I take that back?
Today I couldn't seem to get the right arms with the right legs, and half way through one combination our teacher stopped, and annoyedly started singing, "one of these dancers is different than the other". I felt so sorry for the poor soul who she was talking about, and then, to my great disappointment, found it to be me. I fixed my position, and she smiled and continued the class. Embarrassing much?
Yes.
Much.
I know that things worth accomplishing are rarely easy, but do they have to be humiliating too?
On a happier note, I did notice that I'm not the only girl in the class who doesn't know what on earth is going on. In fact, there was one girl who asked me to go over the combination with her. I felt like I had just received a gold medal that said, "NOT necessarily the worst dancer award". Felt pretty good. I just hope I taught her the right combination. I think I just miss modern dance so much. That's the majority of what I studied at school, and I feel really strongly that I need to return to it.
Ballet is fabulous; in fact, I fully believe it's the foundation of all dance technique, but for me it's too constricting. I miss breathing while I dance, and I miss getting into positions that feel interesting; not necessarily pretty. I miss performing. I miss it so much. A dear friend of mine just started the same modern dance graduate program that I was accepted into over a year ago. My heart just aches when I think about it; I wish so badly I was with her.
Right now though, I have my little Ballet 2 class, and I've got to appreciate the now; all of the things that I'm blessed with right now. And when I stop to take a look at my blessings, they are so incredibly abundant.
And I'm going to do it while wearing a bra.
Thanks for the support friends, and have a lovely Thursday.
awe alyssa, ballet dancers do have the most beautiful backs. :) the bra thing cracks me up. I doubt anyone judged you for it in fact I bet they all wish they could look like you! Hope the classes get easier!
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