10 mama hacks.

1. put a basket by the bed with night time rituals.
i know i can't be the only mamma with a crazy detailed bedtime regime, right? lotion, teething treatments, essential oils for when he's not feeling well, nose frieda for when he's congested. cream for diaper rash, ointment for scratches, nail clippers, comb, etc. it's rare that i use all of these things every evening, but putting them all in a basket instead of having them strewn throughout the house makes the process smoother.

2. drain the tub while he's still in it.
teddy loves bath time more than anything, and when i pull him out of the tub before he's ready (he's never ready) he gets really sad. draining the water out while he's busy playing helps ease the emotional discomfort of leaving his beloved tubby, ha. (today when i asked him if he wanted to take a bath, he smiled, and started happily chirping as he trotted to the tub while trying to take his shirt off. it melted me in a milisecond.)

3. pots and pans are toys.
everyone told me this, and now i'm repeating it- more for me, than for you. a set of plastic bowls is just as entertaining (maybe more so) than the sixty dollar set of organic wooden woodland animals you've had your eye on for the past 3 months.

4. dance parties tire them out faster.
i'm shocked to see how fast dancing with him for 20 minutes will exhaust him. and i'm getting exercise so it's a win win, right? by the way, exercise never happens for me. and i thought i'd be one of those hot fit moms...

5. become best friends with the park.
when we first moved here, it was smokey and we hardly ever made it outside. my incision wasn't healing well, and getting down the stairs, getting teddy in the car seat and out into the world seemed like a battle not worth fighting.
i've learned something since last summer: the park is the best. it gives us fresh air, it entertains the shiz out of teddy, it puts us both in a better mood, and he's exhausted when we get home. of course, now that teddy's a little older, it's easier for me to get out; but next time, i'm going to try to be friends with the park sooner.

6. take deep breaths.
when the anxiety comes (and if you're like me, it will come) it helps for me to have some breathing techniques ready to go. i wrote in this post about taking 60 seconds to help recenter myself.

7. don't buy the outfit you feel meh about. (for you or for your baby.)
i'm still grasping this one, but i'm trying to only purchase things that i absolutely adore for myself and teddy, and ironically it's resulted in me feeling a lot more free when i'm buying things. if i have any doubts, i just leave it on the rack. i've saved a ton of money on semi cute onesies that i don't love, even thought they're only five bucks, and i've spent a little more on things that i love, and will use for all of my babies.



8. buy fresh flowers.
gid buys me flowers every few weeks, and i can't tell you how much more cheerful it makes our living space.

9. make lists to spark productivity.
make a list.
prioritize with numbers.
get to work.
check it off.

it'll feel so so good.

10. document.
i never regret taking an hour to take pictures of my little boy. the ones i've taken of him even a few months ago are already so special. things you document now will only gain value. it doesn't matter if you have a nice camera, or if you feel like you take great shots. you're setting a legacy for your family to look back on.

(bonus)
11. stick together.
don't be catty to the mom who parents different than you.
don't ignore when your sister or your mom calls.
don't be jealous of the girl who doesn't have kids, and gets to travel all over the world while you're wiping diapers.
don't be mean to the grandma who gives you advice with a raised eyebrow at church. (even if she drives you nuts.)
we need each other.
and we're on the same team.
xo

teddy's bloomers

at the park with whistle & flute! (promo code inside!)

happy monday, guys. this weekend went by way too fast for me, and i woke up with a serious case of the mondays. teddy and i both get grumpy when gid has to go to work in the mornings. everything is just better when dada is home.

anyway, let's celebrate the start of the week with a promo code for a way cute clothes company, k?

if you're on instagram at all, chances are you've seen whistle & flute clothing pop up. this company is killing it on social media with their cute minimal unisex clothes.

 i'm always on the lookout for pieces that i could have a little boy or girl wear (because baby stuff is expensive, and i want to double dip now and then, k?), and i'm crazy about these monochromatic shirts especially. why is the happy raincloud so cute to me? they have a similar one with a lightning bolt (and matching leggings, soooo...)

when we got our whistle & flute package in the mail, i was way impressed with how soft the material is. when gid touched it, he was like, "woah, do they make adult clothing?" ha.

ps- they do. (i'm getting us matching shirts to the one teddy's wearing in the pictures below...)

did i mention whistle & flute clothing is a family company, and its products are also ethically made?
i wish that was more common.

teddy  looks like a teenager in this picture and i'm crying.

i included this ^^^ picture of teddy sucking on his shirt, because he's really particular about the material he puts in his mouth. it has to be super soft. i only ever see him chewing on his bamboo swaddles. the whole time i was taking pictures of him, he wanted to just eat his shirt, lol. if it's got mine and teddy's approval, you know it's high quality, ha!

whistle & flute is being super nice and offering the readers of this blog 10% off their order with the code theveryhappypear, so go check them out right now before i buy everything, k?

this post brought to you by whistle & flute.
opinions, as always are 100% my own.

30.

my goal this birthday was to focus on gratitude. because i have so much to be grateful for. 

and while i'm stupid good at noticing the things in my life that aren't perfect, i've got to get better at honing in on the many many many beautiful things that i'm surrounded by. there's enough bitterness and negativity in the world right now without me complaining about body fat percentages, or my head that is sure to be covered in gray by this time next year. 

where was i? oh, right. i was saying that i want to be part of the good.

as i'm typing this post, all i can think about is how our lives right now are so beautifully imperfect, and how boring it would be if everything always worked out flawlessly. right now our apartment is an unbelievable mess; a solid reflection of my cleaning efforts this week. yesterday we had pizza from a box for dinner (and i'm not even sorry because it was digorno and delicious). i'm behind on my projects. again. because sometimes teddy is just too adorable (or demanding) to take my eyes off of.

but how wonderful to have a home that's warm and inviting (even if it comes with piles of folded laundry on the couch). how amazing to have the luxury of driving a car to the grocery store, coming home, pressing a few buttons in the kitchen, and having a meal come out of it. (some might argue me calling pizza a meal, but those people are snobs and are welcome to not read this blog.)

how wonderful to be with the best person i know, and to have our beautiful baby.

even if he still wakes up some nights, and drives me crazy most days.

(talking mostly about teddy here...)

but seriously, how crazy lucky are we to have him?

how fortunate to have made it to 30 years, even if, especially if it's included bad hair days, road rage, sickness, heartbreaks, and all the other ugly things that come with imperfection.

how fortunate to be able to experience a little bad, 

so i can see more clearly how very very good i have it. 

gideon insisted that i have exactly thirty candles on this beautiful cake.

goodbye, twenties. hello thirties.
i'm so happy to be here.
xo

lately.

the past few days he's been cracking me up so much. just little things. like when he's taking a bath, he'll stand up to pee, or have gas, and then smile really big and sit back down. he makes little motor noises while he's playing with his toys. he laughs so easily at my jokes. who knew that having a baby who thinks you're hilarious is the best thing ever?

yesterday, i was having horrible cramps, and when i curled up on the ground, teddy crawled over to me, and gently put his head on my back. he's so sweet without even meaning to be.

he's starting to be able to breathe again when he sleeps. there's no better non sound in the world.

it's unbelievable how the maintenance people redoing our stairs (noisy!) know just when i've put him down for a nap- and yet he sleeps through the ridiculous racket. he's so tired; catching up on the past few weeks when he wasn't getting good rest in.

i was stung by a bee for the first time in my life last week.
it wasn't as bad as the hype i've built up over the past 30 years.

teddy climbs up on everything, and has learned through trial and error that it's best to go off of furniture and stairs feet first. i'm so proud of him, you guys. did i mention he took eleven steps yesterday? i feel like if i take my eyes off him, he'll start running.

the world is so scary right now. i don't recognize it. were my parents this scared about things like hate crimes and racism? has it always been this bad, and i've lived in a blissful little bubble my whole life? it feels like every time i open my computer, there's a new tragedy, a new crime. i wish we could change it overnight.

i believe there is more good in the world than bad, but i wish we were better.
xo

teddy's onesie 
teddy's bloomers
teddy's taxi rattle (his fav)

please help design my kitchen. or, i am very very bad at commitment.

we're in the middle of designing a home right now, and GUYS it's so much harder than i thought. this is the trouble you hit when you like too many different style aesthetics i guess.

anyway, i need help choosing specifically for our kitchen, and i've narrowed it down to three inspiration pictures:

DESIGN 1
black lower cabinets, white upper cabinets,
with a milky gray granite countertop:


obviously this picture is super chic, and my kitchen would be more of a budget version of this
(not made of money, people! ha!) i love that it looks elegant, but wonder if it's too much for a starter home.

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DESIGN 2

doing more of a matte lower cabinet in a dark color like this gorgeous 

slate blue with the white upper cabinets with a butcher block countertop.

i like the look of the wood countertops, but they're not as good of a choice for resale,

and the upkeep and sanitation i hear can be a little more high maintenance which is no bueno for moi.

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DESIGN 3

all white lower and top cabinets, 

with a white (or maybe very soft gray) countertop and white backsplash.

this may look like too much white, but it also looks like the perfect little starter home kitchen to me, and i love it so much. we don't need to be fancy, right? i worry about this being too dated of a kitchen when we want to sell. (gid also keeps reminding me that there would be little fingerprints all over my white kitchen if we chose this one...)

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FLOORS:

OKAY. i've learned kitchen flooring is the devil, and it can be crazy expensive,
and i've never been more conflicted about anything in my life. these are my final choices for kitchen flooring (as of right now. i'll probably change my mind in 3 minutes).

1: a decorative tile like one of these three



i also kind of like this one. am i nuts? ughhhhh

i thought an interesting tile would make our kitchen look so custom and cute, but i get worried that it would look too busy, and i'd get sick of it in a few weeks. 24 hours ago i had my mind made up that we were going to do the middle choice, and this morning when i looked at it, i felt like it looked so old and tired, and just like a bad idea all around. what do you think?

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2: simple black tile. 

simple. safe. and maybe a little boring. 
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3. wood floors

our home has the original hardwood throughout it, and it may be tricky, but i'm seriously considering trying to find reclaimed wood to blend into the kitchen. the cons of this would be that it's significantly more complicated, and part of me loves the idea of having an accent floor in the kitchen. wood floors go with all three of the designs i love though, so that's a crazy high pro, right?

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i want to take a second to admit that i'm a basket case, and it's sooo silly for me to ask for advice through my blog. now that i've gotten past that, please help me.

comment! text me! send me facebook messages!! help!
or not. whatever. sigh.

happy monday. xo

a year old! (with a video!)

i'll start by saying that i need to worry less about things that don't matter.

i told myself i'd throw teddy an epic first party, that we'd invite all our friends, and have the best time. and when his birthday came and went, and we all were sick, i realized none of us wanted a huge party, and that trying to force something that none of us wanted was silly.

my 12 month baby doesn't care if i throw him a party 6 days after his birthday.

he doesn't care if the occasion includes photos and video taking.
he doesn't care about, or need excessive presents.

he doesn't mind if the cake has candles on it.

as it turns out, he doesn't care if there's a cake at all.

(he took one bite of it, shook his head, and put his arms up for me to take him off the table, lol.
he must have less of a tolerance for sugar than i do because that cake was delicious.)

do you see the tiny hint of frosting on his chin?
i thought he'd be covered in it, ha!

i did a newborn shoot this morning, and kept wondering how it was possible that teddy, my tiny little baby, looks like a gigantic person compared to a one month old. i'm devastated and so proud of him at the same time.

my quiet moments in the past week have been spent wondering if i've been the mother he deserves. because he deserves the very best. did i give him enough attention during his first year? was i patient enough? loving enough?

and when (inevitably) i recall the many times i didn't do my best, i remind myself how lucky i am that i get more than one year to be the mom he deserves, and how patient he continues to be with me, even with my faults (obvious, even to a one year old).

i can't believe it's been 12 months, and 6 days since the first time i heard his long low cry; since i first looked into his deep eyes, and touched his thick, dark hair.

371 days of diaper changes, spit up disasters, and nap time rocking.

371 days of questioning if i'm cut out for this job; somedays feeling wonderful about motherhood, and somedays feeling like i'm in the middle of a major identity crisis, and wondering if i'll ever recognize myself again.

371 days of kisses, snuggles, and tears
(more mine than his, because let's be honest- most of the time, i'm much more of a baby than he is.)

371 days of a love like i've never experienced before.

happy birthday, my little sweetheart.
i'm going to go finish your cake now.
xo

ps- here's a poorly done video i made that someday we're going to cherish very much.