turbulence.

I'll admit, friends. I've been avoiding the blogging world for a while now. I don't really have a very good explanation; I've just been feeling overwhelmed, and when I get this way, I loose all desires of gut spilling via internet.

I hate when I second guess things. Especially decisions; past present or future. Common sense screams to me that it's useless to stress yourself out over things that you have no control over, but for one reason or another, I find myself wrapped up like a pretzel over things that I literally can't do anything about.

You know those moments in life, the ones where you think, "Someday, maybe this will be sort of funny to look back on"? You know- like, right now they're terribly un-funny, but maybe in a month or two, I'll chuckle at it?

Yeah, well yesterday I found myself in the bathtub fully clothed without bubbles or water. I was too exhausted physcially and emotionally to take the effort to draw up some lavender and bubbles. I also didn't really have the time a proper bubble bath requires. So I sat there for about 2 minutes with the lights off and my eyes closed. Even now, it's kind of funny in a pathetic sort of way, but at the time, I was just so defeated.

Defeated by what, you say? I so wish I had a decent answer for you. I've not the slightest clue. Maybe it's because of work. Maybe it's because of classes. Maybe it's the fact that I'm making less money working because I'm taking classes. (Ahem, my fault.) Maybe it's the fact that it's snowing, and I really want to wear sundresses right now. Maybe it's hormones, or missing my family. But whatever the reason (if there is, in fact a reason), I don't think there was any excuse for the extravagant pity party I was throwing myself.

Yet there I lay. Defeated nonetheless.

But as I sat there, listening to the stillness of our small apartment (with the exception of our upstairs neighbor who plays video games with the volume way too high), thoughts seeped into the air around me. Thoughts about how I'm luckier than some of the luckiest people I know. Thoughts about how even if I don't know exactly what the future holds, I've got everything I'll ever really need.

I have a home and a most wonderful companion. But even if I didn't; I've got a family who supports, loves and completes me. I live in a blessed country with benefits so easy to take for granted. I've got a healthy working body. I have passion. I have the gospel.

And cue exhale.

If life and its rushed pace and many stresses have made it difficult for you to feel like rejoicing, then perhaps now is a good time to refocus on what matters most.

-Dieter F. Uchtdorf

simplify.

And have a happy wednesday, friends.

my, how belated this is...

so. valentines day. 2011.

I know it's a little late in the game to be posting about valentines day, friends. After all, it was over a week ago, wasn't it? Well, everything about me has been a little belated lately. I feel like I've got a million pounds holding each part of my body down, and I've had the most difficult time moving lately. We'll get onto that (I'm sure you just *can't wait) later. But first- I'd like to present a few pictures from Gideon and my 2nd Valentines day as a married couple:

First I should mention that my sweet husband outdid himself this year. Every day of February, he wrote me a sweet little note and left it in an unexpected place. One each note he described one thing about me that he loved.

Nice.

Then, on day 7 (halfway to valentines), sweet gid bought me flowers.

They're still smelling up our kitchen. In a good way. I love me some fresh flowers.

There were also the cards.

But I think the topping of the sweet cake (with frosting, sprinkles, and layered ice cream) was the present that gideon had waiting for me when I got home from work. You'll never guess.

Well, you know my blog?

... he made a book out of it.

Just in case "the internet and technology as we know it crumble and we have to rely on books".

His words.

The point is, as I'm sure you've guessed:

I love my husband more than anything in this entire world.

Happy Belated Valentines, Friends.

* sarcasm

pink.

 So, I know that all babies are beautiful,

and each brings a kind of magic to the world indescribable to human lips.

I've seen some truly gorgeous baby girls in the past few months,

but I've never been so in love with a little lady as much as I've fallen for my new little niece, Naomi.

I don't think my beautiful sister (or her handsome husband)

have ever looked as lovely or happy as when their arms were full of this little girly girl.

...and I get to dress her up in pink and have photoshoots.

 It really is such a wonderful life.



I know I already put this one up, but I love it so much, that you get to see it again!



Happy Valentines Day, friends.

baby naomi.

Hi Friends,

My sister just had the most beautiful baby girl, and I just wanted to share a few pictures. These are just some I took with my iphone, but you can bet your boots there are more to come.

Melody went into labor about 2 weeks early, had to go into emergency c-section, and is recovering slowly, but beautifully. Little baby naomi is by far the sweetest baby I've ever spent the night with in a tiny hospital bedroom (since melody has to stay in the hospital for a few more days, mom and I decided to just crash in her room). I think I got about 45 minutes of sleep last night, but we had a really fun little girls night. We ate popcorn and chocolate while we watched Kung Fu Panda, and I got to hold my sweet niece about every 2 hours when she would start whimpering. Ok, now I know I'm blabbing on and on, and it's probably not interesting to read, but I'm just so in love with her!


Hope your Thursday is as lovely as mine, friends!

choreographers block

So.

...so I've been staying late after my evening tech class to work on choreography. I can't believe how much effort it takes out of me, and how out of shape my creative side has gotten. Something I've tried to do is record my ideas so that I don't forget. 

Sounds like a great idea, huh? 

Well, I accidentally pressed the start recording button instead of the stop recording button, taped myself without realizing it, and then when I finally figured out why my taping memory was running out, I took a look at the accidental footage. It was basically hilarious & depressing to watch myself trying desperately to think of something creative to do. I put some clips together and came up with a little home video so someday I can show my kids my prancy dance moves. 

I'll admit. I had a little too much fun putting this together. Some of the clips are me putting a real effort in movement, and some are clips of me just frustrated. I added a few reverse clips in, because I think I'm a better dancer when I dance in reverse, and it's way more interesting to watch. 

I truly hope you enjoy, dear friends. 

ps- the movie technically is over 3 minutes, but it's done when it fades out around 2, 

so don't bother to finish it. 

Just so you know.

Have a happy Tuesday.

love mittens...

ok.

One of my new years resolutions was to try to do something crafty every month.

I immediately made a disclaimer that I was allowed to push it out to every six weeks once january flew by. It took a little longer than I hoped, but may I produce my first crafty craft moment of the year:

introducing....

love mittens. 

Ok, so I didn't actually do that much. All I did was cut out pink felt hearts and sew them onto some old mittens with yarn. But aren't they the best?! I wore them last night on a date and kept talking about them. Good thing I'm married, or I would probably be the worst date ever, right? I mean, I'm still probably a lame date, but at least he's stuck with me. Moo-ving on! Oh, speaking of cows, we ate at BlueCow Frozen Yogert last night for the second time in two weeks. Can I hear a shoutout for frozen yogurt? I mean, if it didn't cost more than a regular thing of ice cream from the grocery store, I'd go there every day.

Ok, moving on for real now.


Have a good saturday, friends!

[framed]

Hello friends. Some of you know that I'm a photographer. Well, at least I got a degree in photography. Since getting married, my photo shoot outings have really slowed down; it's been hard since I work during the hours of day that hold light... Anyway, just as I started to feel a little down about photography, I discovered a fantastic show about professional photographers and their personal techniques. It's a free online program going on right now, and I just had to share. I always have people asking me things about photography, and I wouldn't even consider myself a real professional. This is a rare opportunity for anyone to get insight into the professional photography world without investing any money or intense amounts of time. The first episode of [framed] highlighted professional photographer Mitch Meyer, and in my opinion was phenomenal. It's less than 15 minutes, so if you're interested even remotely in photography, I suggest you go check it out immediately.

Have a lovely day, friends!

Sweet February,

Welcome February.

 I'm glad you're here.

Within your days, I plan to bake heart shaped cookies, make mittens with felt hearts sewn onto them, and buy a boquet of flowers at least once. I plan to wear red & pink at least 4 times a week, and hope to adorn my head with cute valentinesy accessories like these. Within your days I get to attend gymnastics meets and watch gymnasts compete while I eat chocolate and popcorn. Maybe even nachos if I'm feelin' daring. Within your days, the earth slowly starts to wake up from the deep deep sleep it's been in for the past several months. I'm really hoping that I get to see the earth produce some green this month, february. That is, if I remember what the color green looks like. It feels like an eternity since I last saw a real, live blossum.
Welcome February!  Welcome Welcome Welcome!