teddy

we don't have a name picked out for him yet. why does everyone seem to think that i know what his name is going to be? i imagine he'll come out, and introduce himself to me. just to be safe  i'm planning on having a list of five names to take with me to the hospital. i should get started on that.

you want in on a secret? i call him teddy. that doesn't mean that's his name forever. i just like thinking of the baby boy in my tummy as teddy tolman.

teddy has been doing this thing lately where he does jumping jacks on my bladder when i'm trying to fall asleep, and first thing in the morning when i'm trying to stay asleep. i twitch, hoping to coax him to get into a new position, but he politely declines every time.

these days he almost always wakes me up with sweet little thumps ("how about a little breakfast, mamma? no hurry- whenever you're ready... i''ll just keep entertaining myself by practicing flutter kicks till you get up, take your time...")

i'm not digging the whole lactation thing. no one warned me about this. the first morning it happened i thought i just kept dripping cereal milk on my chest. and then i was like, "that's weird, why do i keep spilling exactly where both of my nipples are?" then i flipped out a little.

don't you love how she's half puckering half smiling?

my sister is having a baby any minute. i hate that i'm not there right now, but i'm visiting soon. then mimi and i can resume our traditions of baking cakes, sharing milkshakes and playing with homemade shadow puppets first thing in the morning and last thing end of the day. she calls me her best friend (obvs i trained her to do that...) and it melts my heart every time.

i know some day, sooner than later, i'll just be her (super cool and trendy) aunt alyssa.

but for now i'm lala, her best fweind. we have a secret handshake and everything.

i have a feeling after teddy comes everything will change. like i won't be able to just jump on a plane and visit mel and mimi just because i haven't seen them for 4 months.

maybe i can. maybe teddy will be an awesome traveler. i've heard most babies don't really like planes. if he's a good traveler, than i'm planning on going on a trip to amsterdam, prague and vienna with him and gid.

sigh. do lots of mammas to be stay up late at night wondering all the ways their life is never going to be the same again? that's what i'm doing right now...