four months.

teddy's four month shots are coming and i am dreading it. i wish we could just skip it and go get a milkshake instead. i know i could handle that like a boss.

i feel like i'm realizing that nursing will never get "easy."
what is easy anymore?! nothing is easy. except gaining weight.

teddy is really hungry for attention lately. like full attention. like eye contact at all times attention. i'm like "okay. don't freak out, but i'm going to move my focus to the computer for 3 minutes to send this email," and he gives me these really sad eyes, and i feel like i must be the worst mamma in the world. (and blogging?! i don't write on here unless he's asleep because there is just. no. way.)

then again- who wouldn't want to keep eye contact with this all day long? 

a sweet friend from college sent me a book on sleep scheduling and a bag full of canadian chocolate (which if you haven't had- you're missing out). i'm so lucky to have such considerate people in my life. i hadn't talked to her in years and she sent me a package out of the blue. i wish i could say i've consumed as much of the book as i have the chocolate. hashtag priorities.

teddy rolled over the other day, except i don't think it counts because he was propped up on a pillow. so, he flopped over the other day. i spent 10 minutes trying to get him to do it again.

my incision has been really hurting the past few weeks, and sometimes i get worried that my body will never heal. something hit me last night though- i don't think it's hurting because i exercise ("exercise" is a generous term for what i do...) i think it's hurting because my nerve endings are healing, and i'm starting to get feeling back in my lower abdomen, and since it was cut open a few months ago, yeah- it's going to sting a little every now and then...

do my c section mamas have any advice or experience they'd like to offer?

i'm thinking about selling our accent chairs, but i'm torn. i simultaneously love them and need to let them go. what do you think, guys? are these something you'd buy if you saw them on craigslist? also- craigslist is scary.

today i was daydreaming about baby girl names, and i went through a storage box of baby girl things i've been collecting since before i even met gideon. i'm so glad i have my little boy. but i wouldn't be bummed if i had a little girl too.

my best friend called today.
why is baltimore so far away? sigh.

happy tuesday.
or is it wednesday?
ugh. happy day.