26.

Every year it comes: July. And it always brings the same sun kissed days: sweet Canada day. Independence day, with its glorious fireworks. July 24th, with its pioneer quaintness.  Did you know July is national blueberry month? Did you know it is also national hot dog month? It is. Supposedly. According to the internet. July also had friday the 13th this year. I suppose it would be spookier if it wasn't so beautiful outside. This July brings a special gift: the beginning of the summer olympics. Can't wait. Only comes every four years. But every July-- every single one brings the 14th. Directly following the 13th. It's my birthday. The 14th, I mean.

I have a lot of friends who have graduated from the "excited about my birthday" phase and have moved on to the "I'm old and unaccomplished" phase. I never used to get it. I mean- we're 80s babies. We're not "old" for at least another few decades, right?! It drove me nuts. This year, though- I started to kind of get it. Its not that I don't feel accomplished; I do. And its not that I feel old; I don't. People tell me all the time that I look young for my age, and when I rented a car to go to Texas, the guy spent about 30 seconds squinting back and forth from my drivers license to me making sure that I was truly 25 or older.

I don't feel old. I just am starting to get why people my age do.

One of my friends wrote a post on her blog recently about the frustration of time going by and finding yourself in the same place you were when you started. I ached for her for a split second, because I can relate. Sometimes I feel like I've been stuck -emotionally, mentally or physically- and I just can't get out of the rut, whatever it is.

And so when July came around this year, I was antsy. Its been a weird summer anyway, and I found myself wondering how I would celebrate. Count the hairs on my head that fade from deep brown to auburn to blondish and finally to a silvery white? Thats a little pathetic. Go shopping? A little better. Watch episodes of boy meets world? That seemed pretty legit. My mom surprised me for a week long visit which was THE best present I could have asked for. My birthday consisted of fun errands, shopping at bookstores, trying to stay dry from a last minute rainstorm (oh sweet rain), and staying warm drinking soup at a local cafe. We finished the night off by going to a dance production in the conference center theatre showcasing some of our choreography. Simple day. Simple and lovely.

 It was sort of awesome. Low key. And awesome.

And as I blew out the candle on the slice of marzipan cake that gid bought me, I decided to just be grateful. Its been kind of an amazing 26 years. And by kind of, I mean totally.

Thanks for the sweet birthday wishes, friends.