Best Friend Weekend.

My favorite Canadian friend in the world came to visit me this last weekend. 

Remember Brittany from this Post?

In the midst of eating Canadian junk food, watching movies, giggling nonstop and having continuous girl talk, we unfortunately didn't get around to taking any pictures, :( sorry.  After the last few weeks, having my bestie over was like a tall glass of ice water after a horrible drought. So good to see her pretty face, do a little bit of shopping, see some sweet conference, and snuggle all weekend. 


Much thanks to Jason for putting up with our silliness all weekend.

Question...

How do you find where you belong while still being true to yourself? My first six weeks in grad school have been such an interesting experience. Most of the time I love it; I mean its is sort of a dream dancing everyday and focusing on curriculum that I'm truly interested in. I'm super lucky to take classes with a ton of people in different stages. It's not only my graduate class; there are two other graduate levels and the entire undergraduate students in the modern dance program. Sometimes though, its interesting to watch dynamics in the classes. People who are determined to be seen as intellectuals, people who are determined to  be "popular" (and I thought I was done with that in high school...) , or people who just want to fly under the radar and do whatever they need to in order to get by.

...and then there's me. 

I'm sure this doesn't come as a surprise to you, but my training in dance at the University of Utah is very different from my undergraduate study. I had a clear idea of what graduate school would be like, and it's been remarkably close to what I anticipated. I'm just starting to wonder where I fit into all of it; especially if I change. What then? You know?
 ...do you know? It's ok if you don't. I'm not sure if I do either.

Did anyone else have a rough transition into the grad ed world?

... I hope your Monday isn't as confusing as mine, friends.

MFA Modern Dance 101:

Top Ten Things I've Learned in 

Month #1 of Grad School:

1. Undergrad= more socially and physically draining.

Grad school = more emotionally and intellectually draining. (... ok, and physically draining too actually)

2. My body has been so good to me. I should be so much more sore than I have been. 
And yet, holy snap--  I am so sore lately.

3. Turns out, I do sweat.

4. I neeeeed 8 or 9 hours of sleep, or I will not make it through my first technique class.

5.  Having live music to dance to, somehow is the coolest thing. Ever. 
I never want to dance to anything but live music ever again...

6.  When I dance alot, I eat alot. Yeesh.

7.  I care waayy too much what other people think about me.

8.  The University of Utah's facility is the friggin' nicest building dedicated to dance (that's right folks- the whole building is ours) I've ever seen. Not to mention the incredible faculty. And not to mention the sweet curriculum. Basically my life is awesome.

9. I'm always going to be super busy with homework, class preparation, stretching, and bubble baths. Goodbye to the majority of my favorite shows on hulu...

10.  I'm a better dancer than I thought I was. 

I'm not saying I'm good; just better than I thought I was.

back from the dead/dance studio...

Oh, friends. What a bizarre and magnificent month of graduate school its been. I've been afraid to visit this online journal-- and I'm not really sure why. There's simply no time to go to my technique and lecture classes, be a wife, make dinner, fulfill callings, keep up on readings, and homework and write in my blog, you know? I was sorta thinking maybe I'd just delete my blog, not because I don't care, but just because when I'm purging time consumers in my schedule, blogging sort of falls low.

Speaking of priorities: I've been way too into shoes lately, friends...

Thanks to my jenny for her sweet persuasion that I continue my writing. 

Warning: there's probably going to be a lot of posts filled with grad school drama, obsessive love of the new season we're in, and tons and tons and tons about dance.... just warning you.

Ten Years.

Can't believe it's been ten years since September 11, 2001. Do you remember where you were? I do. I was in my American History class in high school. My classmates and I stared in shock at the television screen as terrified news casters reported the attacks on the World Trade Center. At first, one of my classmates was sure it was some sort of sick joke. Part of me really wanted to believe him. I don't even know what to write. I remember having a lump in my throat the entire day. I remember not eating lunch. I felt sick. I remember my dad picking me up from school, and us both being silent the entire drive home, both knowing that something unforgettably tragic had happened.

It's been ten years. I can't believe it's been ten years.

I remember hearing different stories; each tragic and unique in it's own way. I remember hearing that the air was so thick with dust that people couldn't breathe without masks for hours. The city will never be the same. The country will never be the same. Thousands died. Thousands.

I don't know anyone personally who died in the terrorist attacks, but I feel a strong tie to them through our country. Even stronger, I feel a tie to them through humanity.  I don't know what to write.

Thank you troops.

Our land is free because of the brave. Because of you.

Reasons I'm the luckiest girl:

1. When I have a rough afternoon, I have a tall, loving, 

handsome boy happy to sweep me up and make me forget I had ANY reason to be sad.

2.  ... I don't think I actually need a number 2.

I know it's rather prejudice, but I think he's the best in the world. 

Certainly the best in the world for me. 

I was having a conversation with a dear friend the other day, and we got to talking about soul mates. I would never have described Gid as a soulmate of mine; we've far too many differences. For example- he likes to enrich his life with meaningful study chalk full of purpose, and I-- I just really like Jackie Chan movies. (HOR-rible plots, but fan-taasss-tic fight scenes. You don't watch a jackie chan movie for the stunning cinematography or the phenomenal acting...) 

In so many ways, Gid and I are night and day. Perhaps I'm the night. But maybe he's the twinkling glimmer of a north star. He completes the picture. Thank heavens I didn't marry a fellow night. I might not have such lovely stars. 

I'm really tired right now friends, and I'm sure this makes no sense whatsoever; I'll probably wake up in the morning and delete it all when I see all of the bad grammar and random metaphors.

My point is- I love my guy.

ps- Kala, you can puke all you want. I seriously do not care.

Have a Happy Monday, friends.

Dear Boots,

I've had the strangest obsession with you lately. 

Why? I haven't the foggiest. 

Is it the fact that (even though this awful heat is trying to hide it from me), I know that fall must be just around the corner? Is it because I like to wear tall socks, or jump in puddles? Is it because my clothing taste is changing like a maturing taste bud? Who knows, boots? I bought an adorable pair of cowboy boots less than a week after we moved to the Salt Lake area.

They were (I thought) very reasonably priced. 

But for the last few weeks, I've had my eyes on these babies:

I see jeans, striped top, belt and head band for school. 

No! I see flowy skirt, cute tank top and jean jacket for a saturday afternoon... 

No- I see gingham shirt, jeans, and a bandana in my hair while camping.... 

The possibilities are endless.

(sigh) Oh, boots- I don't know what kind of spell you've put on me.

 All I know, is that I want you. All of you.

Dance Log 22

Found my leotards: check.

Breakout of pimples due to stress: check.

Day One of Grad School: check.

It's starting to feel real, friends. 

I love it so much already.

Have a happy Monday.

create.

Hi, friends! Super grateful to the lovely hannah for suggesting I write a little bit about something I'm already very passionate about: ever since I was a kid I've always loved using the creative side of my brain. I remember having backyard experiments and adventures, but it wasn't until I was an adult that I realized I really have a passion for creativity.

My favorite way to use creativity is easily found through the arts; I'm an avid photographer, and enjoy trying to find unique ways to capture lovely moments and sweet personalities. There's something special about being able to stop time for just a moment and document it. Take this photo:

I photographed this shot at a wedding. At the moment I snapped this, this sweet little girl was admiring her obvious crush (the groom), as he adored his new bride. A few seconds after I caught that shot, I heard the little girl say to her father, "someday I'm going to make a boy love me that much." I just about melted, and when I discovered the photograph, it became one of my favorites.

Another way I love to use creativity is through music. 

Not a lot of people know that I play a few instruments and love to write music. Even fewer people know that I actually won a state competition for composing and singing a piano song (...ok, it was in elementary school, but it COUNTS people, ok?) Right now I'm going through a ukulele obsession thanks to Zee Avi. Ukulele is a little less intimidating than guitar to me (with two less strings to worry about), and I love the light hearted tone that escapes the strings. I've learned a few of her songs, a few ingrid michaelson classics, and I've even written one or two.

Isn't Zee friggin' cute?! Check her out if you like to be happy.

Right now amidst crazy moving, I'm super excited about creating a homey feeling in our TINY apartment that we're moving into in a week. I love using elements of creativity along with design techniques to make a home that is cute, comfy, and enjoyable to be in.

Ever found an old junky end table? Before you chuck it in the dumpster, consider throwing on a coat of fresh paint, some new artsy knobs, and a vase with some fresh flowers in it on top of it. Add a punch of color, some old and new, and before you know it, you've got "shabby chic" meets "country fresh", meets "I'm an artsy creator of adorableness".

And that's just a part of the bedroom- don't even get me started on the living room, bathroom, and kitchen. There are so many ways to invite cheerfulness into the place you live! I just love decorating my home. (... or I will when I finally get to move into it.) Ok. Moving on.

I'm also a huge fan of dancing, especially using choreography techniques to create pieces of art. For me, creating movement is especially unique because the art form that emerges is a living, breathing, four dimensional canvas. Dance requires the most courage of the art forms from me. Its so much more than skill and effort; emotion is so valuable, but too much of it can take away from the intent of the piece. Really- I believe any kind of choreography is ambitious; dancing is a delicate and difficult art form to learn, let alone to attempt to create.

Inspired words on creativity: "Everyone can create. You don't need money, position, or influence in order to create something of substance or beauty.... The bounds of creativity extend far beyond the limits of a canvas or a sheet of paper and do not require a brush, a pen or the keys of a piano. Creation means bringing into existence something that did not exist before-- colorful gardens, harmonious homes, family memories, flowing laughter."

 I love these words, because they confirm what I've always known about creativity: it's not always things you'd win a talent show with; it can be literally anything. I've had a lot of friends say things like, "I'm not a creative person. I don't have an artsy bone in my body." Creativity has little to do with artsiness. In fact, you can't help but be creative. One way or another.

You can choose to use your actions to create happiness, or misery. It starts as little as that. You can choose to create a positive feeling in someone by giving a sincere compliment; by supporting and loving a friend, or you can create negativity, and pessimism by convincing yourself that you're not good enough. Everything we do is a creation; one way or another. Small creations like feelings can develop into greater and greater masterpieces that we have brought into existence. We've been given so much potential by the divine creator, and it is entirely up to us how we use the gift of creation that He has given us.

Long story short: anyone can create anything. 

Long story shorter: this life is so very beautiful.

Thanks again, Hannah.
You're so truly lovely.

Pet Peeves.

I just gotta get them out. Forgive me.

In No Particular Order:

-animals dressed as humans (I guess it freaks me out more than anything...)
-Bad drivers. Like really bad. Like multiple violations in a day and they don't notice it, bad.
-When people put their luggage on the seat next to them trying to discourage others from sitting next to them.
-racists.
-indifferent ignorance.
-people who victimize themselves. (ex: "My life sucks, because this happened to me." "...actually you did that to yourself. Stop complaining and do something about it.")
-UGG boots with mini skirts. 
-Lack of manners: ignoring questions/ mumbling/ not saying your pleases and thank yous. Rude people drive me nuts.
-Needy girls who can't be independent.
-Yappy dogs.
-pictures of people that they took themselves. In the mirror... (we all do it, but don't POST it. Or heaven forbid, FRAME it.)
-Tantrums (especially by adults. especially by female adults) I try not to, but I think I'm harder on girls than boys.
-Mean people.  
-Being two (or three or four or five) faced. Fakeness = Not cool, man.
-When people misspell things on purpose. (ex. "kewl")
- When people buy a digital camera, have zero training and declare themselves "professional", and start charging people! Take a class, or better yet teach yourself something before you begin charging. (Cringe)
-When people don't use the right "their, they're, or there's". Elementary school, people.
- Skanks.
-over sharing via facebook status. It's like a diary for some people! (more like diarrhea...)
- adult cartoons. (family guy, simpsons, south park... I like my cartoons to be free of nudity, and profanity please.) 
-Perfume by crappy celebrities. (Don't encourage them, people.)



ok. I feel better now. sorry if that got ugly for a second.